i succeeded.

After dating, getting engaged, and tying the knot,

i have experienced everything society has always expected of me.

Correction-

after graduating from high school, earning a college degree,

then getting married,

i have accomplished what society expects.

I succeeded.

But we have no idea if a college degree will make us happy,

or if marriage will make us happy,

or if having children will.

How are we able to know whether something will make us happy if we havent experienced it?

Before experiencing marriage, or any of life’s events,
its only an expectation created from society.

I believe everything serves a purpose,

so i regret nothing in my life,

but i definitely have some new perspectives.

Within the past year,

my perception of marriage has completely transformed….

because i have experienced it first hand.

Malcolm and I both feel like marriage hasnt changed us,

hasnt changed our relationship.

This is a good thing, because i dont believe marriage
should be considered if its to improve your relationship,

or to make each other happier,

or to anchor your man down.

These things should already exist.

We discovered marriage hasnt changed us
because we were already ultimately committed,

we always have been,

so marriage wasnt a milestone.

The milestone was the wedding itself:

our closest friends and family were in one place at one time!!!!

It was so special, so precious,

and it will probably never happen again!

What if Malcolm and I had a ceremony to celebrate our love and commitment,

without signing a piece of paper.

Would people still consider us husband and wife?

Or what if we didn’t have a ceremony at all,
and in private,
made promises to one another and to God.

Would people still consider us husband and wife?

photo by CamillaRain Photography

Because im not religious,

I havent considered what religion texts state about marriage.
This post is a reflection of my own experiences with marriage.

To read another post about this topic click here.