My biggest hurdle is my greatest asset

I have MANY  limitations during wedding days and family sessions…..
Lighting: the lack of natural light in homes, harsh, direct, and uneven sunlight
during wedding ceremonies, DJ reception lights….
Subjects: intense bridesmaids, controlling or stoic men/dads (sometimes women), moooooody toddlers,
gassy newborns who keep fussing, anxiety ridden mothers, body conscious women….
My job very much depends on the subjects… I cannot get emotional photos without emotion.
BUT with ALL of that being said…. my biggest hurdle is that I NEVER believe I do a good enough job.
It is a constant feeling. It may dissipate for 4 minutes after taking an image I love soo much, but then the feeling returns.
I want to be better. I think I could have shot EVEN better than I did, although I simultaneously believe that in the moment, I did the best I could with what I am given. Thats my motto : “Do the best you can with what you are given,”
because most scenarios are out of my control. I have to roll with sooo many punches!!!
I always know what I need in the moment to get “the shot,” but the execution usually is out of my control, honestly: the toddler will not look at me (I don’t even need a smile, just one look), or the groom is SO DONE taking photos the energy is palpable,
or the time clock reads ZERO and the wedding planner is like, it’s go time!!!
I am in a weird constant flux of: “Ahhhhhhh I could have done better, I should have done this, I should have done that!!! Why didn’t I do that!!!” but, “NO, I had SO many limitations,
I KNOW I did the best I could in the moment.”
BUT I do believe that my mental hurdle of never feeling like I did my best, PUSHES ME to actually do MY BEST!!!
Its also a blessing that makes me, ME!!
The photographer on the ENDLESS pursuit of amazing, unforgettable, hilarious, omg images!!